James 1:10 But the one who is rich should take pride in his low position because he will pass away like a wild flower.
I watched her walk down the aisle, escorted kindly by her son, Bob, and Duane, her dad. Instead of carrying cookies or a pan of hot dish she was carrying a bouquet of pink roses and daisies. Instead of wearing slacks and a sweater, she wore a knock out white dress, and white stilettos on her feet which no way came close to elevating her stature to the size of her character. Brenda and I got together in front of God and our families in Fairview, Montana on Saturday and got married.
The night before I was visiting with 3 of my sons. They were proud to be in Williston. They were awed by the traffic and sights. In many ways it wasn't so much different than the home they are used to, but they sort of came to an understanding of what is happening out here, with the fracking of oil shale, the jobs and the economy it is creating. My son Dakota proudly and humorously displayed a hoody and sweatpants touting "North Dakota.... Bakken.... Oilfield Trash."
It was right after many laughs, we went down to the pool for a quick splash. When I opened the door to the pool, I was instantly greeted buy the sound of Mariachi music, the smell of cumin infused food, and the unmistakable laugh of an old friend. "Buenos Noches mi amigo," exclaimed the unique familiar voice of no other than Jose Jimenez. We exchanged a few handshaking formalities. I offered him pizza and he gave me one of his delicious burritos. I never did quite understand how or why he was at the hotel, the same as mine. It was just good to say hi. Go figure!
Today, i dropped Brenda off at the school where he works, and I will soon go to pick her up. I worked on the laundry, some business, and finally got a chance to blog a few thoughts.
Today I was thinking about the first time I had left for Williston this fall. I specifically remember the wild daisies by my mail box. How quiet it was when I left... and when i returned both to Penguin Lodge this Fall and to Penguin Terrace this Winter in my new home. A lot is happening. Domestication... Life. A lot is happening here too out in the patch and on the line... families are still getting together for celebrations, still going to work, still worrying about grandmas, still coming together before God and following Him.
The daisies in the bouquet may wither, and the ones by the mailbox may be dormant, but the last I heard Jesus is not on the cross anymore because He is alive and with us. To others we may be oilfield trash, but to people like me we are all just a bunch of God's children trying to be in the Bakken.
Showing posts with label connections. Show all posts
Showing posts with label connections. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Planting Time
God grants me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, gives me the courage to change the things I can and gives me wisdom to know the difference. I struggle with three simple words. What. When. Where.
I am glad that i do not depend on farming for a living anymore. Instead I put in a little seed for the wildlife. A couple years ago, my cousins Bradley and Ryan and I just up and figured it was time that we get with the times and start putting in food plots. Ryan has a little land up north of town in a swamp. I remember planting trees with his dad Eddie up on that farm. I don't know how it all happened, but we worked up a little one year and scattered a little soybeans by hand. While they were growing we got this bright idea to work up a little more for the following year, so we resurrected a few old implements, gave Eddie's WD45 Allis Chalmers a little TLC and went to work. The next year came and we got a hold of an old corn planter, we worked up a little more. Now we have about 15 acres to plant, and our conversations each spring are debates and debacles about what to plant, where to plant it, and when. As of today before this last rain shower we have about 3 acres of corn and 4-5 acres of soybeans.
So the debate and questions sometimes seem rhetorical for the sake of hearing the answers and opinions of the what, where, when to plant. Many frustrations and feelings occur arise out of those questions. Sometimes tiffs or arguements. The Bonds of men through hunting and family ties must be considered. Ryan and his sister own the land and a tractor. Bunky has the planter. Bradley has a sprayer. We all come up with some seed. it seems. Little chess games need to be played until someone finally goes out and just starts putting seed in the ground. It's not anything close to precision farming and by today's standards of auto steer and satellite technology, we are lucky to stay straight for fifty feet in a row (depending on who is driving). The actual money farmers don't get a vote on whether the crop is good or bad. Only the benefits of wildlife and hunter's that share the benefits of being in our gang share the satisfaction of coming to hunting ground that has been enhanced for the enjoyment of living an outdoor lifestyle that has been handed down to its benefactors for 5 generations.
I didn't get to plant last year. Didn't get to watch the plot grow. To top it off, I didn't get to hunt. " How unfair," I thought. But little did I know that this was the least of my problems. They did get worse. Life as it would have it moved from the recreational wa waaas of bickering kids in a sandbox to things that people in a free God loving society shouldn't have to go through. Many stories of women from the Bible come to mind Eve Deborah Delilah Jezebel. The reader should get the picture and I choose not to tell thier stories. My story is of the aftermath and I am a guy. It reminded me of the Story of Jacob with his dysfunctional family problems; more so, his son Joseph. Such is life when times when life doesn't treat a person fair. Gen 37:23-24, "So when Joseph arrived, his brothers ripped off the beautiful robe he was wearing. Then they grabbed him and through him into the cistern..." It got worse for Joseph. He was thrown in prison, made a slave, but he made his best to serve the Lord. And in the end things turned out for all around him.
Oh those brothers of Joseph. Oh those kids, wives, cousins, friends.... If they....
Joseph was granted courage to change the things he could. Serenity? How could he have that all the time. We need serenity to accept the things we can not change. First I cannot change other people's attitudes or their actions. I have to accept the consequences of my own actions and take responsibility for my past failures. 1 Sam 15: 11 ," 'I am sorry that I ever made Saul king, for he has not been loyal to me and has refused to obey my command.' Samuel was so deeply moved when he heard this that he cried out to the Lord all night." I can only look at the decisions that I have made, look at the seed I have sown and say yes. That was me. I did these things. This is my part. These are rows that I planted and the seed I used for the ground I put them in. Try to make them right.
Wisdom! What is the difference in knowing between the things I cannot change and having courage to change the things in which I can? Well for me the answer is prayer and scripture. I must pray for God's will to be shown to me and to make me willing to live in the spirit of obedience. My father a fellow hunter isn't here to hold my hand any more and my children are old enough that their grip in times of need seem less firm. Others express their opinions on my future decisions. But ultimately they don't get a vote. Just as when those questions arise of what where and when to plant in a simple little food plot for wildlife; it is not much different in the question of human life. The question ,"If" is in the middle of the word L"if"E. It always seems that I find the answers in the Words from the Bible. Living obedient to those words where I hadn't before is the only wisdom I have found to make a difference. Praying for God to show me His will and to give me the right seed to plant in others. I must live in a spirit of gratitude for the lessons and tests in life. Be where I can live and act in a spirit of obedience and guard it all the time.
For those who Believe, Jesus also struggled, but accepted, In Luke 22:42-53 Jesus is met by his betrayer, neither panics nor is frantic ...simply offers a simple question," Judas, did you come to betray me with a kiss?" Then he healed again a slave who has his ear cut off. Jesus first asked ," if you are willing, remove this cup from me." Likewise serenity is not simply detachment – distancing ourselves from our dreams and desires. Rather, what we see in Jesus is a continuance of his mission…with hope! It is a trust that God is good and out to do good to us always.
As Paul wrote, “God works for the good in everything with those who love him and are called according to his purpose.”
I have planted my seeds now as straight and true as I can in the best places and most ready where God has shown me to plant in this time between the rains. God has shown me many ways in which he wants me to trust Him. I will continue to plant each year straighter rows with better seed suitable for the right purpose . I will watch for the plants to flourish , grow and hopefully mature. And I will travel back to the plots to see where my Faith is good, my Trust is reaffirmed. And continue to see the good in where my failures of tests have lead me. And fear not- knowing that in the journey I am doing the best I can. My Peace.
I am glad that i do not depend on farming for a living anymore. Instead I put in a little seed for the wildlife. A couple years ago, my cousins Bradley and Ryan and I just up and figured it was time that we get with the times and start putting in food plots. Ryan has a little land up north of town in a swamp. I remember planting trees with his dad Eddie up on that farm. I don't know how it all happened, but we worked up a little one year and scattered a little soybeans by hand. While they were growing we got this bright idea to work up a little more for the following year, so we resurrected a few old implements, gave Eddie's WD45 Allis Chalmers a little TLC and went to work. The next year came and we got a hold of an old corn planter, we worked up a little more. Now we have about 15 acres to plant, and our conversations each spring are debates and debacles about what to plant, where to plant it, and when. As of today before this last rain shower we have about 3 acres of corn and 4-5 acres of soybeans.
So the debate and questions sometimes seem rhetorical for the sake of hearing the answers and opinions of the what, where, when to plant. Many frustrations and feelings occur arise out of those questions. Sometimes tiffs or arguements. The Bonds of men through hunting and family ties must be considered. Ryan and his sister own the land and a tractor. Bunky has the planter. Bradley has a sprayer. We all come up with some seed. it seems. Little chess games need to be played until someone finally goes out and just starts putting seed in the ground. It's not anything close to precision farming and by today's standards of auto steer and satellite technology, we are lucky to stay straight for fifty feet in a row (depending on who is driving). The actual money farmers don't get a vote on whether the crop is good or bad. Only the benefits of wildlife and hunter's that share the benefits of being in our gang share the satisfaction of coming to hunting ground that has been enhanced for the enjoyment of living an outdoor lifestyle that has been handed down to its benefactors for 5 generations.
I didn't get to plant last year. Didn't get to watch the plot grow. To top it off, I didn't get to hunt. " How unfair," I thought. But little did I know that this was the least of my problems. They did get worse. Life as it would have it moved from the recreational wa waaas of bickering kids in a sandbox to things that people in a free God loving society shouldn't have to go through. Many stories of women from the Bible come to mind Eve Deborah Delilah Jezebel. The reader should get the picture and I choose not to tell thier stories. My story is of the aftermath and I am a guy. It reminded me of the Story of Jacob with his dysfunctional family problems; more so, his son Joseph. Such is life when times when life doesn't treat a person fair. Gen 37:23-24, "So when Joseph arrived, his brothers ripped off the beautiful robe he was wearing. Then they grabbed him and through him into the cistern..." It got worse for Joseph. He was thrown in prison, made a slave, but he made his best to serve the Lord. And in the end things turned out for all around him.
Oh those brothers of Joseph. Oh those kids, wives, cousins, friends.... If they....
Joseph was granted courage to change the things he could. Serenity? How could he have that all the time. We need serenity to accept the things we can not change. First I cannot change other people's attitudes or their actions. I have to accept the consequences of my own actions and take responsibility for my past failures. 1 Sam 15: 11 ," 'I am sorry that I ever made Saul king, for he has not been loyal to me and has refused to obey my command.' Samuel was so deeply moved when he heard this that he cried out to the Lord all night." I can only look at the decisions that I have made, look at the seed I have sown and say yes. That was me. I did these things. This is my part. These are rows that I planted and the seed I used for the ground I put them in. Try to make them right.
Wisdom! What is the difference in knowing between the things I cannot change and having courage to change the things in which I can? Well for me the answer is prayer and scripture. I must pray for God's will to be shown to me and to make me willing to live in the spirit of obedience. My father a fellow hunter isn't here to hold my hand any more and my children are old enough that their grip in times of need seem less firm. Others express their opinions on my future decisions. But ultimately they don't get a vote. Just as when those questions arise of what where and when to plant in a simple little food plot for wildlife; it is not much different in the question of human life. The question ,"If" is in the middle of the word L"if"E. It always seems that I find the answers in the Words from the Bible. Living obedient to those words where I hadn't before is the only wisdom I have found to make a difference. Praying for God to show me His will and to give me the right seed to plant in others. I must live in a spirit of gratitude for the lessons and tests in life. Be where I can live and act in a spirit of obedience and guard it all the time.
For those who Believe, Jesus also struggled, but accepted, In Luke 22:42-53 Jesus is met by his betrayer, neither panics nor is frantic ...simply offers a simple question," Judas, did you come to betray me with a kiss?" Then he healed again a slave who has his ear cut off. Jesus first asked ," if you are willing, remove this cup from me." Likewise serenity is not simply detachment – distancing ourselves from our dreams and desires. Rather, what we see in Jesus is a continuance of his mission…with hope! It is a trust that God is good and out to do good to us always.
As Paul wrote, “God works for the good in everything with those who love him and are called according to his purpose.”
I have planted my seeds now as straight and true as I can in the best places and most ready where God has shown me to plant in this time between the rains. God has shown me many ways in which he wants me to trust Him. I will continue to plant each year straighter rows with better seed suitable for the right purpose . I will watch for the plants to flourish , grow and hopefully mature. And I will travel back to the plots to see where my Faith is good, my Trust is reaffirmed. And continue to see the good in where my failures of tests have lead me. And fear not- knowing that in the journey I am doing the best I can. My Peace.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Rainbow Connection
Been a little disconnected lately from my friend Jose out on the line. Not much going on... just waiting for the weather and a call to head back to the Tioga Lateral Project in North Dakota. In the meantime, the my union is sending me to a training school to train me how to dig safely and effeiciently around hot (flowing) lines. I can't help but remember m last conversation with my friend Jose. I distinctly remember him talking about his family. We pipeliners often spend a good deal away from our loved ones, and latley I am sure as I have been doing, connecting again with friends and family we love the most.
I find it amazing how people even connect at all. Think about it. Take two individual human beings. They contain different likes and tastes, unique qualities and preferences, different experiences and quirks...egos! It seizes me to with astonishing wonder, how the human race could even repopulate itself, much less form civilizations, or societies. I ask what is that bond that makes two people get along, or even give someone a first smile, not just in a male/female relationship but more so, just two people; say, for instance, a kid and an adult. Something more, something unseen, a force, a power of connectivity must be hard wired, or either is moving around us that must be in and among people. I call this the rainbow connection. This weekend I can say I truly experienced that connection.
My friend Brenda came to visit this weekend. Crazy! She drove all the way from Williston to see Middle River, a drinking community, with a farming- hunting- fishing problem Of course I was excited and nervous. What would I show her? Who would I want her to meet? She arrived safely and we began our little journey. We had plans generally to show her some local flavor, fabric stores, attend church services, see the quilters guild. I wanted her to meet some of the kids that were around, and of course my mom and grandma Our first stop on Saturday morning was Young's General store in Middle River, too much to explain so I ask the reader to just Google it. I wish I could describe the look on her face when she got into the fabric and sewing section. She is a quilter. And she found something she liked and wanted. Things were going good. Next stop, Thief River Falls, we just started driving , and she said, "Where does your Grandma live?"
Oh yes! Karlstad, She has been in the nursing facility for a few months. I can't believe we almost forgot about grandma. So we visited her. I told Brenda stories about grandma on the way down. But here are somethings I didn't tell her. She was just an ordinary home-made grandma. She loved to see us, she loved to send us away with something every time we saw her, whether it be a plate of cookies, or a National Geographic. She knitted and sewed. She warmed up beans on the wood stove while she cooked everything else in her oven. She baked bread and made terrific soup. She had us over often when we were growing up, and loved if we would drop off the little kids for a half hour while I picked up groceries. She once even had a cat that was invisible to the world especially little kids. She would boss us around a little, and we loved her for it, and was animate if our behavior wasn't up to her standards. She was a high class kind of lady who tried to make sure we were doing our best. And around her we always were our best. We talked for awhile on Saturday morning. It was good to visit. Ten minutes down the road I received a text from my cousin Kari. We had just missed her. She was also visiting grandma too. It was truly a great day for Grandma.
The rest of the day we made our destinations, and I truly loved the conversations we had. Supper, Supper mess, clean up. Bed time.
The next morning getting ready for church services we were interrupted. Grandma took a turn for the worse. We traveled to Grand Forks where she was admitted.Not much we could do, but we did all we could to make her comfortable. It was emotional. It was not fun. We all wanted answers and all we could do was wait. Brenda suggested to get away for a bit. And as for me I was in agreement. I didnt like what I saw in the hospital anyway. So we traveled to Buxton, ND to spend an hour with Jeremy and his famnily. (Brenda's son). I was greeted at the door by running toddlers and preschool age kids holding nothing other than wild bunnies. They all hugged their grandma and were so proud to show off their baby rabbits. Baby wild rabbits tamed and used to being held by energetic kids in the taming process of the human spirit. Jeremy's in laws were also there. I would really like to get to know Scott, a bow hunter from Duluth, MN. His wife was interesting too, and I felt really at home around them, I recognized the Finnish-Minnesota accent right away. What is that power that makes people even friendly? What is it that makes a person want to sit down with someone that you have never met and just talk?... about stuff. But we did. And then we went to back to Grand Forks to see Grandma, and my brother Tony. I traveled back to the hospital leaving Jeremy and his family and departed with a picture from Mattea, a wavy crayola rainbow that now hangs on my fridge.
Nothing changed, but we? We traveled home and now our conversations were more melancholy, light, undertones of sadness, and gratitude that we had spent a little time to be with her while we were our best and she could see that. Brenda stopped by the hospital with myself, my brother and mother on her way home to Williston. I walked her out to the car and a few minutes later Grandma Tootie passed over to the other side of the rainbow.
" Why are there so many songs about rainbows
and what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
and rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection..."
( Jim Henson)
I imagine Jose is getting connected back at his home now too. Family bonds are more cemented like the glue in life. But its the connection between people, those transparent colorful moments that create memories. Like a rainbow, we can see it, we know its there, but we can't quite apprehend it. We can try to explain it, and more often than not we ask more questions because of it. What is it that connects us, family? I suppose to a degree. That isn't it though, because it goes even deeper than those kind of relationships. I believe it is more temporal like those rainbows, shared dreams, visions, common ideals, a shared smile about something or someone that both can agree are just commonly good, in that shared moment, that Presence. There is no denial that rainbows come and are that power from God. Like grandmas or the ideas of grandma, a kid giving a crayon picture to an adult, a friend waiting in a hospital room. Fortunately my grandma was an ideal one, a connection we feel with others that brings out our best. The connection that makes us hope that the people we meet, we will know for a lifetime. Today I am fortunate enough to experience the connection: "...The lovers, the dreamers and me."
I find it amazing how people even connect at all. Think about it. Take two individual human beings. They contain different likes and tastes, unique qualities and preferences, different experiences and quirks...egos! It seizes me to with astonishing wonder, how the human race could even repopulate itself, much less form civilizations, or societies. I ask what is that bond that makes two people get along, or even give someone a first smile, not just in a male/female relationship but more so, just two people; say, for instance, a kid and an adult. Something more, something unseen, a force, a power of connectivity must be hard wired, or either is moving around us that must be in and among people. I call this the rainbow connection. This weekend I can say I truly experienced that connection.
My friend Brenda came to visit this weekend. Crazy! She drove all the way from Williston to see Middle River, a drinking community, with a farming- hunting- fishing problem Of course I was excited and nervous. What would I show her? Who would I want her to meet? She arrived safely and we began our little journey. We had plans generally to show her some local flavor, fabric stores, attend church services, see the quilters guild. I wanted her to meet some of the kids that were around, and of course my mom and grandma Our first stop on Saturday morning was Young's General store in Middle River, too much to explain so I ask the reader to just Google it. I wish I could describe the look on her face when she got into the fabric and sewing section. She is a quilter. And she found something she liked and wanted. Things were going good. Next stop, Thief River Falls, we just started driving , and she said, "Where does your Grandma live?"
Oh yes! Karlstad, She has been in the nursing facility for a few months. I can't believe we almost forgot about grandma. So we visited her. I told Brenda stories about grandma on the way down. But here are somethings I didn't tell her. She was just an ordinary home-made grandma. She loved to see us, she loved to send us away with something every time we saw her, whether it be a plate of cookies, or a National Geographic. She knitted and sewed. She warmed up beans on the wood stove while she cooked everything else in her oven. She baked bread and made terrific soup. She had us over often when we were growing up, and loved if we would drop off the little kids for a half hour while I picked up groceries. She once even had a cat that was invisible to the world especially little kids. She would boss us around a little, and we loved her for it, and was animate if our behavior wasn't up to her standards. She was a high class kind of lady who tried to make sure we were doing our best. And around her we always were our best. We talked for awhile on Saturday morning. It was good to visit. Ten minutes down the road I received a text from my cousin Kari. We had just missed her. She was also visiting grandma too. It was truly a great day for Grandma.
The rest of the day we made our destinations, and I truly loved the conversations we had. Supper, Supper mess, clean up. Bed time.
The next morning getting ready for church services we were interrupted. Grandma took a turn for the worse. We traveled to Grand Forks where she was admitted.Not much we could do, but we did all we could to make her comfortable. It was emotional. It was not fun. We all wanted answers and all we could do was wait. Brenda suggested to get away for a bit. And as for me I was in agreement. I didnt like what I saw in the hospital anyway. So we traveled to Buxton, ND to spend an hour with Jeremy and his famnily. (Brenda's son). I was greeted at the door by running toddlers and preschool age kids holding nothing other than wild bunnies. They all hugged their grandma and were so proud to show off their baby rabbits. Baby wild rabbits tamed and used to being held by energetic kids in the taming process of the human spirit. Jeremy's in laws were also there. I would really like to get to know Scott, a bow hunter from Duluth, MN. His wife was interesting too, and I felt really at home around them, I recognized the Finnish-Minnesota accent right away. What is that power that makes people even friendly? What is it that makes a person want to sit down with someone that you have never met and just talk?... about stuff. But we did. And then we went to back to Grand Forks to see Grandma, and my brother Tony. I traveled back to the hospital leaving Jeremy and his family and departed with a picture from Mattea, a wavy crayola rainbow that now hangs on my fridge.
Nothing changed, but we? We traveled home and now our conversations were more melancholy, light, undertones of sadness, and gratitude that we had spent a little time to be with her while we were our best and she could see that. Brenda stopped by the hospital with myself, my brother and mother on her way home to Williston. I walked her out to the car and a few minutes later Grandma Tootie passed over to the other side of the rainbow.
" Why are there so many songs about rainbows
and what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
and rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection..."
( Jim Henson)
I imagine Jose is getting connected back at his home now too. Family bonds are more cemented like the glue in life. But its the connection between people, those transparent colorful moments that create memories. Like a rainbow, we can see it, we know its there, but we can't quite apprehend it. We can try to explain it, and more often than not we ask more questions because of it. What is it that connects us, family? I suppose to a degree. That isn't it though, because it goes even deeper than those kind of relationships. I believe it is more temporal like those rainbows, shared dreams, visions, common ideals, a shared smile about something or someone that both can agree are just commonly good, in that shared moment, that Presence. There is no denial that rainbows come and are that power from God. Like grandmas or the ideas of grandma, a kid giving a crayon picture to an adult, a friend waiting in a hospital room. Fortunately my grandma was an ideal one, a connection we feel with others that brings out our best. The connection that makes us hope that the people we meet, we will know for a lifetime. Today I am fortunate enough to experience the connection: "...The lovers, the dreamers and me."
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